Behavior Tips

We all know those parents of 2-year-olds who claim they've got the terrible 2s under control and their kid is perfectly disciplined because they have the secret behavioral formula. But for most moms of toddlers, it can be incredibly frustrating trying to keep under control a child who is at an age when he is not exactly a rational human being.

That's why moms like Danielle P. want to know what is reasonable when setting behavior standards for toddlers. She says she's tried and failed at "everything" to try to discipline her "independent, determined, stubborn, and adventurous" 22-month-old daughter. Lisa A. feels similarly frustrated, noting, "Sometimes I feel like I'd get more of a response talking to/disciplining a rock."

So what do you do when you're pushed to the limit and feel like nothing is working with your misbehaving toddler? While there's no one-size-fits-all approach to discipline — some moms maintain a good spanking is the key to disciplining a toddler, while others are adamant about avoiding spanking — many Circle of Moms members agree on the following tried-and-true strategies for helping tots learn good behavior and helping moms not feel so frustrated in the process.

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When my second son was 4 he developed an amazing trait . . . the ability to lie. It was absolute talent. Most of the time I couldn't tell if he was telling me the truth or telling me a lie.

One occasion that stands out was when he had a small toy from a kid's meal. It wasn't a big deal, but for three hours I drilled him on where he got it and he repeatedly told me that he had found it at the playground. We went to bed that night, me exhausted, and I told my husband, "I just don't get it. I really thought he was telling me a lie." I cried because I felt I had persecuted my child.

We let it go and two days later, I learned the truth. My son had told me a lie. He had taken the toy from a little boy in our apartment complex. I was angry. I took action.

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Verbal defiance from a toddler who is just beginning to test limits is relatively easy to take in stride, but many parents are unnerved when bigger kids talk back. As Circle of Moms member Amanda P. shares, it's not only irritating, but downright disrespectful: "My 7-year-old thinks he can smartmouth us whenever he wants, and that it's fine for him to be disrespectful, especially to me."

Seeking suggestions from the Circle of Moms community, Amanda asks, "What do you guys use for a disrespectful child? I don't want to sit back and do nothing only [to see] this escalate into something bad. Any advice?" 

First, take a deep breath so that you don't wind up arguing back, say our moms. Then, try these four tips for taming the sass.

The first day my child started school, he became the subject of the class bully's attention. Starting at school for the first time is nerve-racking enough for both parent and child, but to have that first day memory shredded by bullying is truly awful.

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It's only natural to want to be the best parent you can for your children, but could you be doing too much? As mom Cyd S. asks the Circle of Moms community, "What do you do if you are accused of being a helicopter mom?"

When you, your child's teacher, or someone else suggests that you are doing too much for your child, the first step to take is to "step back and evaluate yourself and your actions," mom Shawnn L. recommends. "It's hard not to helicopter," she admits. "So, if you've been told that you are a helicopter, evaluate your behavior and how you approach interactions with your child's/adult's teachers."

If you see any of the signs that you are overparenting, then "you may want to try to correct a thing or two," Shawnn says. Here, Circle of Moms members offer four tips to give your parenting style a healthier balance. 

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Have you ever witnessed a child who constantly dominates a conversation, or a child who grabs objects out in public, even after being told not to touch? What about a child who just doesn't seem to know how to wait his turn? Are these kids "bad," or are they kids who need help learning how to control their impulsive natures?

Keep reading to find out.

No one is perfect. Not your kids, not you, and certainly not me. I'm a parenting expert, educator, and coach, and I am not a perfect parent. There is no such thing as a perfect parent. We all make mistakes and have lessons to learn from our experiences in life. Oh, the messes I've made from time to time!

Each misstep in life has a purpose and causes further fallout for us to deal with. Each misstep is a teacher of sorts. No one likes that fact, and every parent forgets it at times. Whether it's due to stress, the fast pace of life, or our own childhood wounds, there are times when we forget that our child is just a child, and has only made a mistake, not committed a crime.

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Toddlers aren't the only children who have tantrums! Teenagers often throw their own angry tantrums, resorting to foot-stomping, door-slamming, yelling, and more. If you're looking for ideas on how to respond to your teen's emotional outbursts, here are five key steps Circle of Moms members suggest.

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Before I ever became a mom, I was a teacher. While I don't claim to be a perfect teacher or a perfect mommy, I do believe that I relate to children quite well, thanks in part to my time spent "in the trenches." Those six precious years of forging relationships, offering guidance, and teaching science to 150 students each year taught me several things that have also served me well as a parent. Keep reading for the eight most important.