LilSugar

Do You "Sneak" Out of Work to See Your Kids?

Rebecca M Gruber — Tue, 17 Apr 2012 08:03:12 PDT

There isn't a specific date on the calendar, but sometime in the past two decades, the 9-to-5 workday disappeared, and the quantity of time spent in the office came to outweigh the quality of work completed. For moms who work outside the home, the shift has been extremely difficult, reducing the number of families that eat dinner together and generally reducing the amount of time parents and kids spend together. The only option for some moms who hope to see their tots before bedtime is to sneak out of the office and then "prove" that they are still dedicated by sending emails throughout the night.

Sheryl Sandberg, Facebook's COO, has been an outspoken advocate for working mothers. In a recent interview for the PBS Makers series, the mother of two admitted that she leaves work at 5:30 every day in order to see her kids, but didn't talk about it for years. She said, "I walk out of this office every day at 5:30 so I’m home for dinner with my kids at 6, and interestingly, I’ve been doing that since I had kids. I did that when I was at Google, I did that here, and I would say it’s not until the last year, two years, that I’m brave enough to talk about it publicly. Now I certainly wouldn’t lie, but I wasn’t running around giving speeches on it." She also admitted that she feels like "there's no such thing as work-life balance. There's work, and there's life, and there's no balance."

The Burden of the Working Mom: Fact or Fiction?

LilSugar — Wed, 15 Feb 2012 08:33:40 PST

If you've been part of an office environment while pregnant or as a parent, chances are, you've faced challenges (and some judgments, too) that are nonissues to your co-workers. In a recent article for Forbes.com, Victoria Pynchon states her case for the working mom, admitting frustration when her "mom employees" would have conflicting obligations but also noting that she now realizes that it wasn't necessarily their fault. She writes:

As I look back on the problem for both me and the working mother, I realize that my law firm simply failed to take into account the existence of working mothers on my team when planning my staffing needs. This was not rocket science. There was plenty of work for women to do at home if they had to relieve a babysitter or pick up a child at 6 p.m. If I needed a live, warm body in the office, better management on my part and better support from HR could easily have solved the problem.

According to a set of statistics presented by Dina Bakst, cofounder and copresident of A Better Balance: the Work & Family Legal Center, absences because of illness, injury, or medical problems are often two to three times as high as absences because of "child care problems, other family or personal obligations, civic or military duty, and maternity or paternity leave."

We want you to weigh in! Share your workplace experience by voting in the below poll.

Off to Work We Go: 5 Books For Children of Working Moms

Rebecca M Gruber — Wed, 11 May 2011 05:47:43 PDT

A mother's work is never done, and if working outside the home is part of her routine, her lil ones usually don't have the opportunity to see what she does most of the day. Every WOHM has that moment where her tots turn to her and say, "Why do you have to go to work?" If you find yourself fumbling for an answer, these five books may help you explain it better than you could on your own. Fellow working mamas, including Iron Chef Cat Cora, have penned picture books to help kids understand that mommy loves them, even if she has to pack a bag and head off to work each day.

Tina Fey Pens New Yorker Piece on Working Motherhood

Heather Maddan — Tue, 08 Feb 2011 10:17:37 PST

Women who say they don't battle the working mother's dilemma - Am I spending enough time with my children? - are lying. Even celebrities, with fame, fortune, and a lot of help face it. Comedian Tina Fey - mom to Alice, 5, - tackles the subject in a witty piece she penned for the New Yorker, titled, "Confessions of a Juggler." The abstract reads:

What is the rudest question you can ask a woman? “How old are you?’ “What do you weigh?” No, the worst question is: “How do you juggle it all?” The second-worst question is: “Are you going to have more kids?”

Do you agree?

Lil Community: The Great Mommy Debate

Lil Community — Thu, 20 Jan 2011 00:05:00 PST

Let the debate rage on! Over in A Place to Vent, an anonymous reader submitted her thoughts on the ongoing debate over working moms. Here is an excerpt from her post.

The most fulfilled I have ever felt is when I became a mother, something so many women today take for granted. Yes, I can already hear the outraged cries from Gloria Steinem and NOW. Helen Reddy is pondering, "Did she not listen to the lyrics of 'I am woman'?" But I stand by my claim. Raising a child is the most important gift we have been bestowed. Yet in 2011 I am constantly amazed at how many of us choose to pass this awesome opportunity off to people who are barely adults themselves, or at the very least can't wait the 4-5 years to do this until the child is of school age. Our excuse, as if there is one, is that it's our duty to define ourselves outside of the parameters of the traditional mother and wife.

Let me preface this by stating that I am all too aware that it is indeed a fact that some of us must work to put a roof over our heads. I know from where I speak, I am a divorced mom who was abandoned by her husband and am without any support from my son's father. I have gone from living a cosmopolitan life abroad to residing in a more humble suburban setting. Despite the fact that the most exotic thing I do these days, is travel down the ethnic food aisle at Whole Foods, I am confident that the sacrifices I am making today in order to be a daily part of my son's life, possesses far more value than anything I can purchase off of Net-a-Porter.

If we are perfectly frank here, the majority of those women adorned in their Tory Burch tennis outfits and Gucci sandals, dropping their precious cargo off at daycare, look a far cry from being one step away from standing in the breadlines. I highly doubt that their haste is the result of a desire to head straight to their jobs at Walmart. With a simple blow of a kiss and a small wave of the hand they are dismissing the one true thing in their lives as though they were just another accessory in their status wardrobe.

Keep reading to see the rest of the reader's thoughts on working moms. Overwhelmed by a crying baby, fighting tots, overbearing in-laws, and competitive parents? Start venting in our anonymous group, A Place to Vent and share your stress with fellow moms who understand your plight.

Who's the Mama?

Rebecca M Gruber — Thu, 09 Dec 2010 09:00:00 PST

Which celeb mama discussed the guilt that comes with being a working mom?

It’s tricky being a working mom. You feel guilt all the way around. You want to be there for your husband, be there for your kids, be great at your job, all that stuff. But at the end of the day, if you put everyone in front of you, what happens to you?

Were You Sad to Say Goodbye to Uninterrupted Shut-Eye?

Heather Maddan — Mon, 08 Nov 2010 07:00:00 PST

Sleep is for the weak...or childless. Lots of mothers say goodbye to their hours of uninterrupted shut-eye once baby debuts. And, even once a tot is sleeping through the night and has a sibling or two, it doesn't mean parents necessarily have time to hit the hay. There are only so many hours in the day and for moms juggling a career, family, and their children's commitments, burning the midnight oil can become routine. Do you long for sleep or do you just consider the lack of it part of parenthood?

Mom Talk: The Toughest Part of Working While Raising Kids

babysugar — Tue, 28 Sep 2010 09:00:38 PDT

Moms need to work it, even when it's not easy! Some career driven mamas are in a constant juggle as they try to keep their home, work, and personal lives in motion. We asked our moms the toughest part. And Twitter follower @CathiThalia said, "Have you got all day?"

Finding balance: As akseymour said, "It's hard to be up all night with a sick child and then be coherent at work. It's also hard to have a stressful day at work and separate that from your kids when you get home."
Guilt: Facebook fan Alisha McWhorter expressed it best, "I love my little girl and there are days I feel guilty I don't get to be with her. And guilty that I know I need a job to help me stay sane and balanced. But then I am reminded that I am modeling for my little girl, and I want her to see that you can be a mommy and a working woman all at once, and do them both well."
Finding proper care: Twitter follower @xx_ajp_xx told us that leaving your child in someone else's care was the toughest part.
Exhuastion: As Facebook fan Tricia Talerico said, "I'm always tired [and] don't get anything done until my son goes to sleep for the night. Then I stay up late so I can get 'me' time."
Going with the flow: LilSugar pointed out that a mama could have her entire day planned out to the minute, but "then something happens and it all goes haywire!" erniew echoed the same sentiment, "I am trying to control things less and just go with the flow. Be less temperamental and irritated and more relaxed/in tune with what is happening right at that moment."

What's the Hardest Part About Balancing Career and Kids?

babysugar — Fri, 24 Sep 2010 07:00:59 PDT

A working mama is hardly ever off the clock. Though there are plenty of tips, apps, and products designed to make a WOHM's life easier, it's tough. Some women feel guilty for not staying home with their kids while others love the benefits of a profession Either way, the mamas have to figure out how to get everything taken care of at the office and at home! What do you think is the toughest part?

Seven Tips to Ease Back Into Work

babysugar — Thu, 10 Jun 2010 09:00:20 PDT

Returning to work after maternity leave can pull on even the toughest mama's heartstrings. There are plenty of reasons to love being a working mom but taking those first steps into the office requires strategic planning. Before grabbing your briefcase, check out these tips to ease the transition back into the working world.