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You Know You're a Mother When
You Know You're a Mother When: Sitting One Out
As a mom, I have learned that one can expect the unexpected at any time. This past Saturday started out with high hopes and promises. To get our day started, I took my tots to a jumpy house birthday soiree that was blessed with clear blue skies and red velvet cupcakes.
Do You Excuse Fellow Moms For Being Late?
Grabbing your keys and running out the door is a distant memory when you enter motherhood. The process suddenly involves packing the diaper bag, doing one last nappy change and ensuring your clothes are clear of spit up stains. All of the last minute prep work can easily make a mama late for her meeting, playdate or appointment, but if the plans involve fellow moms, most are usually sympathetic.
Things Moms Can Leave Behind When Flying
When moms begin flying with their wee ones, the friendly skies quickly turn into anxious ones. Parents embarking on their first airborne adventure with a child will quickly learn that some things are not what they used to be. There are five things that most every parent can leave at home when they've got their child in tow.
You Know You're a Mother When: Date Night Preparation
Remember when a "date" used to get a woman all hot and bothered? Before hitting the town, she'd take a long shower, deep condition her hair and shave her legs. Maybe even blow out her hair and flat iron it for a sleek look.
You Know You're a Mother When: Where Is My...
After spending 30 minutes kneeling on the ground and lifting couch cushions, mom suddenly realizes her sunglasses were on top of her head. Whether she puts the milk in the cupboard or her keys in the fridge, a busy woman is known to misplace her belongings — an occurrence that seems to become more common in motherhood. At the airport the other day, we got off the parking shuttle van with all of our vacation loot.
You Know You're a Mother When: Tot Takes Over Television
When babe's is in arms, a mother can watch what she wants — from Grey's Anatomy to The Real Housewives, she doesn't have to worry about wee eyes seeing racy scenes or hearing inappropriate language. Then, the child enters the toddler phase and it's time to tame what's being shown on the tube. This can get hairy if the home only has a single television set.
You Know You're a Mother When: Your Daughter...
Is a Supreme Court Justice nominee and thanks you for your sacrifices. Sonia Sotomayor told the Senate Judiciary Committee:
"I want to make one special note of thanks to my mom. I am here today because of her aspirations and sacrifices for both my brother, Juan, and me.
You Know You're a Mother When: Two-Year-Old Dance Party
Keg stands or beer funnels may have been crowd pleasing party tricks back in mommy and daddy's heyday, but as hangovers worsen and children enter the picture, a parent's idea of a good time changes dramatically. Instead of dancing to deafening music and staying up to watch the sunrise in a state of inebriation, older versions of their former selves enjoy livin' it up with their innocent wee ones. Taking the place of a foolish friend doing the worm are a pair of two-year-olds holding hands and boogieing down while laughing uncontrollably and singing, "Shake, shake, shake...
You Know You're a Mother When: The Diaper Bag Is Your Purse
There are two types of mothers: those that sit and enjoy a glass of wine while they wait for the babysitter to arrive and those who scurry around the house in a robe until the sitter comes a knockin'. Unfortunately, I fall into the latter category. In a rush to get to a dinner date the other night, I ran out of the house with my diaper bag on my shoulder rather than a sassy leather pocket purse.
You Know You're a Mother When: Undies on the Run
I've suffered through embarrassing "mom"ents where I run out of the house with my dress unzipped and makeup partially applied. I've taken the trash out in my robe and walked around my place bare chested with the nursing pillow around my waist not minding my neighbors. While none of these instances are limited to mothers, I find more moms identify with the harried stories than our childless counterparts.
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