LilSugar

Mommy Dearest: Wants Boyfriend to Be at Baby's Birth

LilSugar — Thu, 03 Sep 2009 14:36:22 -0700

Mommy Dearest,

I am due with my first child on Sept. 13 and am completely accepting of the fact that I likely overshoot this due date. My boyfriend has been supportive the entire pregnancy and very vocal about how he wishes to be in the delivery room, which I am happy to hear! Unfortunately his side of the family suffered the loss of grandmother recently. We will attend the memorial service this weekend, but the burial will take place the weekend after my due date.

The place is about six hours away, so I obviously cannot go if I have not given birth yet, but my boyfriend has made it clear that he will go whether the baby is here or not! I am terrified of being alone for the labor and delivery if he cannot make it back in time. My mother will be there for the delivery, but I have always looked at her being there as more of a secondary support person and am counting on my him to be there so we can experience it together. Since it is my first delivery, it may take a long time and he might make it back in time, but that is not a chance I want to take! Am I being selfish for wanting him to stay home from what would be the second memorial service for his grandmother? How do I approach this topic with him?

- Want Boyfriend There For Birth

To see the response from Mommy Dearest,read more.

Want Boyfriend There For Birth,

You are not selfish - you're a soon-to-be mom who wants to experience the birth of her child with the baby's father. It is completely understandable that you wish and rely on him to be present at the life-changing event. I would approach the topic by telling him how you feel and being supportive in regards to him losing his grandmother. You may also consider having other dads talk to him about their birth experiences and why they think it would be appropriate for him to stay home from the burial if it comes to that point. Good luck!

– Mommy Dearest

Submit a question for this feature at the Mommy Dearest Group on our new Community page.

Source: Flickr User salimfadhley

Laboring Women Can Get Their Drink On

LilSugar — Wed, 26 Aug 2009 05:00:46 -0700

Expectant mamas going through marathon labors can now quench their thirst with more than ice chips. For the first time in several decades, the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists has modified their liquid intake guidelines allowing women to drink clear beverages during labor.

According to the new recommendations:

"Women with a normal, uncomplicated labor may drink modest amounts of clear liquids such as water, fruit juice without pulp, carbonated beverages, clear tea, black coffee, and sports drinks. Fluids with solid particles, such as soup, should be avoided, however. Women who have uncomplicated pregnancies and are scheduled for a cesarean delivery may also drink these clear liquids up to two hours before anesthesia is administered."

It seems that the reason for limiting women to ice chips was to avoid aspiration – food and liquid entering the lungs – in the event of an emergency anesthetization. The decline of maternal death due to aspiration has lead to the new recommendations, which should be welcomed news for thirsty mamas. Were you allowed more than ice chips while birthing?

Cindy Crawford Delivered Her Baby, Who Delivered Yours?

babysugar — Mon, 03 Aug 2009 14:17:12 -0700

When someone asks me who delivered my baby, I don't hesitate to tell them Dr. Joe. They know that I pushed the child out, but they want to know which professional helped me labor through the process. In Cindy Crawford's fourth and final episode of her My Best Birth webisodes, the model mommy explained how having a midwife at home truly gave her the ability to claim that she, and she alone, delivered her baby. While I get what she's saying, I wonder if some might find her proclamation a bit insulting. Are those who received medical help or had their babies in hospitals any less owning of the action of "delivering"? And what about mothers who required emergency C-sections? Watch the quick clip and tell me what you think of Cindy's perspective.

Tasty Treats For Labor and Delivery Staff

LilSugar — Mon, 13 Jul 2009 06:00:00 -0700

If it takes a village to raise a child, it can take a handful of people to deliver one. Nurses, doctors, midwives and doulas often play instrumental roles in baby's debut. Though only 23 percent of lilsugar readers said they thanked their birth assistants with a gift, those who did made thoughtful purchases. Here are some sweet options perfect for saying thank you that can also be shared with the person's coworkers.

View Slideshow ›

Would You Let Your Hubby Leave During the Pains of Labor?

babysugar — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 09:00:00 -0700

The 80s pop icon Ferris Bueller said, "Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in awhile, you could miss it." Nothing could be truer - especially for a mother in labor. Sometimes work and other circumstances can keep people from enjoying irreplaceable memories like the birth of a child or the marriage of their first-born. While 63 percent of you said it was inexcusable for a father to miss their child's birth due to work, others believed in some cases it was completely acceptable. Telling her own story, Olympic gold medalist Kerri Walsh recently said:

I started my contractions the night before and just labored through the night and kissed my husband goodbye. He had to go play in a tournament... Casey got home around 5 pm and my water broke around 5:05 and then we went straight to the hospital... My husband was a really great coach and little Joey came out at 7:14 pm.

Lucky for Kerri, hubby Casey Jennings made it on time - but many women wouldn't let their partners step foot out the door as they suffered through contractions of a first birth. Would you let your spouse jet while you were in labor?

Would You Use Electrical Pulses to Reduce Labor Pains?

LilSugar — Tue, 30 Jun 2009 09:00:09 -0700

Labor is called that for a reason. Pushing a babe out of mama's bod is not always the easiest thing to do. Sixty-one percent of lilsugar moms chose a drug-assisted birth when they delivered their bundles of joy. The pain and discomfort associated with childbirth is something many women try to avoid with breathing techniques, baths or drugs. Across the pond, some mums are turning to battery-operated machines that deliver electrical pulses via electrodes placed on the skin.

The TENS machine (Transcutaneous Electrical Nerve Stimulator) is said to affect the way pain signals are sent to the brain so when a woman has a contraction and pushes the booster button, the electric pulse nullifies the pain. The retailer claims there are no side effects when using the machine. And, approximately 80 percent of users are saying it was effective for them. Would you consider using electrical pulses to reduce your labor pains?

Did You Buy Your Labor and Delivery Nurse a Present?

babysugar — Sat, 20 Jun 2009 06:00:29 -0700

Everyone has a different experience in the delivery room, but most say labor and delivery nurses are indispensable. Nurses assist from the moment the mama-to-be checks into the hospital until the new babe is bathed, swaddled and eating on his own. They often spend hours coaching the laboring woman to the point of pushing. When mom reaches that state, the doctor takes over for the last 90 minutes and catches the child. While both jobs are vitally important, the nurses are sometimes overlooked as praise is given to the OB/GYN. Other times, families buy the nurses a present to show their gratitude. Did you?

Five Things Not to Say to a Woman in Labor

LilSugar — Fri, 19 Jun 2009 07:00:33 -0700

There's a scene in the fourth season of Sex and the City where a labor and delivery nurse is cheering Miranda on, as she is about to give birth. Carrie turns to the nurse and simply shakes her head, signaling for the cheerleader to cut the words of encouragement as Brady's mom delivers him.

While every laboring mama has an idea of the type of birthing coach she wants to support her throughout the process, an unexpected slip of a few choice phrases can completely change the mood in the room. Knowing what an expectant mum wants during the process can help visitors plan their words wisely, but here are five things that are never appropriate to say to the soon-to-be mother.

"Ouch! Here comes a BIG contraction!"
"Hold on, the team's not quite ready yet."
"Do you think you can cross your legs and hold it in until I get the camera working?"
"My mom said it really didn’t hurt that much."
"I’m ready to get started on the next one, how about you?"

Feel free to add your favorite phrase to the list.

Photo courtesy of HBO

Does Waiting to Find Out the Sex Make It Easier to Accept?

LilSugar — Mon, 08 Jun 2009 14:00:00 -0700

I've never heard of a parent who found out her baby's sex in the delivery room and was disappointed. That's why when people ask my advice, I say to wait . . . especially if the impending mom or pop has a clear preference. I know both men and women who had their hearts set on a son or daughter and were a bit bummed when their ultrasound indicated otherwise. All parents eventually realized how lucky they were to be having healthy offspring.

But when the infant makes his or her debut and "It's a boy!" or "It's a girl" is announced, I'm convinced it's near impossible for parents to pull themselves away from the awe-inspiring moment to focus on anatomy. Do you think this is true?

Photos courtesy of TLC

Birthing Methods to Fit Prenatal Plans

LilSugar — Fri, 01 May 2009 15:00:20 -0700

Every expectant mother approaches her impending labor differently. While some have a definitive plan in their heads, others look at it in a more laid-back manner. In both cases, the mama-to-be has likely done a little research into a variety of birthing methods that reflect personal preferences. From different breathing styles to different locales, take a look at six of the most popular birthing methods.

Source

View Slideshow ›