LilSugar

Popular Methods of Discipline Quiz

LilSugar — Thu, 18 Jun 2009 06:00:50 -0700

Parents look for the best way to rear their children and that usually involves setting standards and boundaries. While certain methods of discipline seem to be generational or trendy others are old school approaches. Take this quiz and test your knowledge!

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Tell Mommy: Should We Reinstate Etiquette Classes For Tikes?

LilSugar — Tue, 28 Apr 2009 09:00:02 -0700

There was a time, not so long ago, when etiquette was not only taught at home, but in classes outside of school. Parents sent their lil ones to seminars to learn about proper salutations, placement of eating utensils and everyday social graces. A dining experience at a restaurant recently made me wonder if our generation of parents should seek out such classes for our kids. As I watched tots of all ages running around the restaurant - some throwing food to get their parents' attention - I could only imagine what Emily Post would have said if she were alive to have witnessed the scene.

A colleague recently told me about the etiquette classes her grandmother sent her to at Lord and Taylor as a child. She learned the proper placement of silverware at the table, where to put her napkin at different points in the meal and how to excuse herself from the table. While she may have learned these nuggets at 12, she carries them with her today and tries to instill them in her preschool-aged son on a daily basis. While he still has his moments where he is almost swinging from the rafters, he knows that noodles must be eaten with a fork, rather than his fingers.

Aimee Symington recently introduced an etiquette board game, Blunders, to teach manners and polite behavior in a fun and exciting way. Would you buy it or send your child to etiquette class?

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Parenting Q&A: My Child Only Eats Carbs!

LilSugar — Thu, 05 Feb 2009 09:00:22 -0800

Q. My child used to eat everything and now at four, she’s an extremely picky eater. How can I encourage her to eat foods other than pancakes, buttered pasta and peanut butter and jelly?

A. Aw, the Carbatarian who enjoys fat as a side dish - very common, but very upsetting to parents, especially moms. Our first way to nurture our babies is through food. Eating what we provide tells us they love and appreciate how much we do for them. Not to mention the pride we take in the child who gobbles tofu and grilled eggplant. In an age where a whole television network is devoted to food, who wants the kid who only eats boxed mac n’ cheese?

For the rest of Lonna's answer, read more.

Let go. If she’s truly eating peanut butter and taking vitamins, as long as your pediatrician finds her to be in good health, let it go. The more attention you give it the more she will push away from trying other things. Taste buds change and as hers developed, she likely is more sensitive and truly finds things noxious. Think of it this way; have you ever gone to dinner with a thirty-year-old woman who ordered pancakes and peanut butter for dinner? Neither will your daughter. She will outgrow this. Certainly offer a variety of foods - make pasta and butter for dinner, but provide other things as well. There are good cookbooks; many people find success in engaging the picky eater in the cooking process. Do not stress her or yourself out. Food issues and girls are a bad combo.

- Lonna Corder

Parenting expert and Montessori school director, Lonna Corder has been doling out advice for 25 years as a teacher, parent/child consultant and on television. For more information, visit lonnacorder.com.

If you're at your wit's end about an issue and want another take on the situation, private message your question to lilsugar. We'll be running this feature all week!

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Parenting Q&A: My Son Doesn't Care About Consequences

LilSugar — Wed, 04 Feb 2009 08:00:44 -0800

Q. There’s no disciplining my two-year-old son. He does not care about consequences. If I threaten him with time out for hitting his sister, he walks up, whacks her and then walks in his room and sits in time out. We have taken away his toys and nothing works -why doesn’t he care?

A. The self-imposed exile is always an interesting move. What does this tell you? Your son needs to be in control and have power. That's what he cares about and that is what you will give and take away. He needs to learn how to earn control rather than maniacally reign over the entire family and eventually, school.

Never threaten-simply do. Make very firm statements such as, “You hit your sister. Hitting is dangerous and unacceptable. The next time you want to do something the answer will be no.” You then make him care for his sister’s tears and he will play with her in a kid way.

To see the rest of Lonna's answer, read more.

Now, this next step is tricky; he will have a request, something he will want to do, it doesn’t matter what it is - watch a show, take a long bath - you must say, “Oh, you made the choice to hurt your sister. Because you hurt her you will not be able to watch your show. Hopefully tomorrow you will make better choices”. This will give you the power to be in charge, but also gives your clever boy the power to choose his future behavior and subsequent consequences. After a few weeks of being very watchful of what he values and taking those privileges away without emotion, simply as a matter of consequence to his poor behavior, he will begin to care and his behavior will improve.

Also important to note: Do praise him as soon as you notice he tries to change poor choices. For example, if there is another time he walks away from hitting his sister say, “ I noticed you controlled your behavior and I really love that!” The praise for the authentic and good behavior will be something he cares about.

- Lonna Corder

If you're at your wit's end about an issue and want another take on the situation, private message your question to lilsugar. We'll be running this feature all week!

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Do You Use Santa as a Threat?

LilSugar — Wed, 24 Dec 2008 05:00:08 -0800

We all know the story about the kid who got a lump of coal for Christmas. But, the other day I was out shopping and overheard a mom telling her son that if he didn't get back in the stroller she'd call Santa. The lil guy was sick of shopping and just wanted to go home. Do you use this tactic?

Let Them Eat Cake...And Candy Canes!

LilSugar — Tue, 23 Dec 2008 06:00:23 -0800

I've never bought into the whole concept that candy makes kids hyperactive so I've never denied my children sweets when it came to holiday festivities. But, now there's reason for the moms who do attribute their tykes' energetic behavior to treats to relax. This Christmas, let your lil one have a candy cane. Guess what myth topped the list of holiday myths? To find out, read more.

On the subject of sugar making kids hyperactive, one report said:

The researchers cite 12 controlled studies that couldn’t detect any differences in behavior between children who had sugar and those who did not. Even when kids had a diagnosis of hyperactivity problems or were said to be more sensitive to sugar, they did not behave differently whether they ate sugar-laden or sugar-free diets. In fact, the biggest effect of sugar may be on parents. Parents rate their children as being more hyperactive if they are told the child has consumed sugar - even when the child hasn’t really had any sweets.

Slice of the Yule log, sweetie?

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Does Red Dye No. 40 Cause Behavioral Outbursts in Children?

LilSugar — Sun, 30 Nov 2008 05:00:00 -0800

You are what you eat and so the saying goes, but a group of parents believe that the food coloring their children digest affects their behavior. Commonly found in processed foods like Twizzlers, Doritos and Twinkies as well as baked goods, red dye no. 40 is to blame for aggressive outbursts in kids according to some moms and dads. The FDA maintains that the dye is safe for consumption. What's your opinion?

Do You Spank Your Children?

babysugar — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 06:00:58 -0700

Raising children today is very different from what it was 30 years ago. In the 70s, parents hardly knew what a car seat was and many of them had no problem tossing their children over their laps for a quick swat to correct bad behavior. Today, youngsters are often praised for doing right instead of being condemned for doing wrong and spanking has practically become a dirty word in many mother's groups.

Do you have a hand in discipline - are you a spanker?

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Lil Tip: Step Outside

babysugar — Fri, 05 Sep 2008 05:00:49 -0700

Occasionally my 22-month-old daughter will lose her mind over something trivial or even inexplicable. During her tantrums, I have tried to pacify her with a book, a hug, a treat or other items. When none of those work, I have discovered that a change in scenery works best.

The next time your tot throws a fit, consider changing her environment. Take her for a walk around the block or a trip to the grocery. It helps to take wee minds off of whatever was bothering them. Pretty soon, they may forget what it was in the first place.
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What Do You Use as Bribe Bait?

LilSugar — Fri, 22 Aug 2008 15:00:19 -0700

Sometimes a sweet treat is all the incentive a tot on the verge of a meltdown needs to pull it together. A whopping 88 percent of lilsugar readers said they've bribed, ahem given their children an incentive to achieve an end result. So what is your kid's poison - lollipops, television time, new toys?
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