True Love: Your Partner or Your Child?

April 17, 2008

New daddy Joel Madden may be fond of his girlfriend and baby mama, Nicole Richie, but lil Harlow is the love of his life.

The Good Charlotte front-man made that clear at a Queens College concert yesterday.

According to People, the rocker said:

You know, no matter how many beautiful girls there are in this audience, I must confess that three months ago, I had a little baby girl, and she's my one and only true love."

Is your true love your better half or your mini me?

Flynet

26 Comments

Frank y Ava 4 years 45 weeks

Your children. My mom always says your child will always be your child but your husband may not always be your husband. That stuck with me, I will love my child more than anything or anyone in the world.

badkitty 5 years 5 weeks

i would die for my kids. no question about it. and it is a whole other set of feelings you have for your children. a much different love, to me, deeper and truer, if that makes sense. and yeah, if you do not have kids, i don't really see how you can have an opinion about this. no offense, it's not possible to understand until you have experienced it first hand/

lizadilly 5 years 5 weeks

I don't think those things are meant to compete. Love is love is love. But if I had to choose, I'd go with children because part of why they are great is because they include your partner, and are the physical embodiment of your union.

Kimpossible 5 years 5 weeks

Lilruck and roor, exactly (and thanks). To me true love isn't about some of the situations that others have mentioned. Like others have said, if there is a tragic accident and a parent has a choice to save the child or their spouse one would think that they'd want the other to save the child, for the continuation of a race. That is the mature, responsible, parental thing to do, that does not mean that our children are our true loves over our spouses (at least to us it doesn't).

stina829 5 years 5 weeks

My son is #1. Always will be.

dmpls83 5 years 5 weeks

by the way, i agree with DarkRayne, i'd be hurt if my boyfriend expressed it that way.. "my one and only"... i mean, where would that leave me??

bellaressa 5 years 5 weeks

I don't have children or a husband. But, thank you ladies for your candid and honest feelings. I am on this blog at least twice a day just getting insight from you ladies.

dmpls83 5 years 5 weeks

by babies i meant both my baby and my boyfriend... :cheer:

dmpls83 5 years 5 weeks

yeah this poll sucks. i love my babies SO MUCH, but it's a different kind of love.. when i think of true love i think of soul mates and all that stuff and when i think of my bby, i think of unconditional, undying love.. it's different and not a fair question...

AVA MARiE 5 years 5 weeks

I don't have kids, but I think your marriage should come first in some aspects, since children need a steady home in order to survive. But, while I know I'd die for my fiance, I can imagine that I would feel that about my child ten fold. Anyway, my mom always says she would literally kill someone for me, and the look on her face when she talks about "if anybody ever touched or hurt my kids..." I know she is serious. Sometimes I think people say it just because it sounds so selfless and good natured, but I know that there has to be some real meaning behind it.

LiLRuck44 5 years 5 weeks

I'm with Kimpossible. To my husband and I, our marriage comes first. Sure I am madly in love and completely devoted to my babies, without a doubt. But your children will one day walk away and leave... I'm thinking I want my husband to stay behind with me. Hard to see that when they're so little and dependent on us for everything right now.

macneil 5 years 5 weeks

Not the same kind of love. Your partner is there to support you and make you feel good, and the feeling is mutual, and you're friends and lovers, but it's very much about how they make you feel and if that element weren't there things would be different. With your child, it is all about you protecting them and trying to make them feel better, and not wanting ANYTHING from them.

roor 5 years 5 weeks

Kimpossible , that's the point i wanted to make - your spouse is (hopefully) with you till the end, it doesn't make you love your kids any less, just a different kind of love. and in any situation where one or the other could be saved , of course any parent would want to save their kid first. i don't think u can compare a parent's love and spouse's love.

lickety split 5 years 5 weeks

i don't think you can answer this unless you have a child. the connection you feel with them, the responsibility, the ache you feel for them when they hurt; it's unexplainable. i use to think that when parents said they would die for their children they were just being cheesy. but now that i'm a parent, i can tell you that dying for your child would be a 1,000 eaiser/less painful than seeing your child die. it's a differnt love. spouses can fend for themselves and children depend on you. they see you as everything and always think you are the best at everything you do; worlds best mommy! that kind of love and devotion; can't duplicate it. you can have many partners and when one leaves they are usually replaced. children are part of you, you live their hurts and successes and they become more important than you almost immediately; as a parent you become your best selfless self. when your child dies a part of you dies that cannot be replaced. i don't know if i'd call parent/child love true love, but it's a more encompassing love and it's unconditional. with a partner it's more what do they DO for you, how do they make you feel, what do you have in common. there's none of that in parent/child love it's just you were born; i love you!

Kimpossible 5 years 5 weeks

My true love is my husband. Of course we love our 4 chilren and they know that beyond a shadow of a doubt. The reason my true love is my husband is because I married him and it's with him I will stay forever, our children are with us only temporarily. We raise them to go out and live happy and productive lives, without us. Of course we'll always be here for them should they need or want us, it's just that when our children do leave home I don't want to be sitting across from anyone other than my true love. For me, if I make my children my true love then I'm in deep trouble when it comes time for them to leave home. This way I won't be lost when they leave, I'll still have the love of my life with me to live the rest of our lives together.

Elsa 5 years 5 weeks

I agree DarkRayne ! While I understand the love a parent have for his child is something special, I would be hurt if my boyfriend said it that way.

KAEB06 5 years 5 weeks

While my child isn't my one and only- both my husband and I would agree that our child is number one in our eyes.

DarkRayne 5 years 5 weeks

The way he expressed it "one and only" where does that leave Nicole, that's a rather hurtful statement towards her.

RobinFabulous 5 years 5 weeks

The love for a child is different. Maybe it's because I've been divorced, but I would lay down my life for my children. If it came down to one of them or my SO, it'd be a no brainer. I brought them into this world, it's my job to make them safe, jmho

krys786 5 years 5 weeks

I can't vote on this one because I don't have children yet...but in my opinion, this is kind of a sucky poll!!! Who wants to choose who you love more? This question is really immature.

coachluvr33 5 years 5 weeks

I would honestly kill for or die for my daughter. She is everything good and sweet in this world and you cannot imagine the love you will feel for someone until you have a child. Not all people feel this way about their kids however, but you should. I do. I love my husband with all my heart. He is an amazing wonderful man and my best friend. The love for them is different but both amazing. I don't have to protect him though. I think that is it. We have to protect her...from evil and bad things and just life. We have lived somewhat of a life already. She is just starting out. She needs us. It is a major commitment. Not something to just jump into.

ShePirate2010 5 years 5 weeks

thats a toughy...id just assume your spouse...but you should love both equally

faerymagick15 5 years 5 weeks

fortheloveofrock....I can totally understand where your fiancee is coming from. I think my husband would do the same...but if it came down to saving me or our child from a burning home or car accident or something like that....I would want him to save our child before me. Until you actually have a child there is no way to comprehend the specific love I am speaking of. It transcends any love I ever felt. Not criticising(sp?), just my own view and experience.

snickle3n1 5 years 5 weeks

I think when the two are not married and haven't been with one another that long as Joel and Nicole the bond isn't as great as you have with your own flesh and blood.....

faerymagick15 5 years 5 weeks

that should have said..."how they look" lOL

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