Tell Mommy: Children of the Opposite Sex in Restrooms?

October 6, 2008

Is it really a big deal when boys use the women's restroom or girls use the men's lavatory? Yesterday, I was waiting in a long bathroom line in Target when a woman turned and glared at the mother and six-year-old child behind her and commented, "He's a BOY isn't he? Why is he in this line?" before turning back around in a huff.

Though the mom simply chose to ignore the woman, the situation was obvious. She was shopping alone with her young son and one or both of them aren't comfortable with him taking solo trips to the men's bathroom yet. In this day and age, parents tend to be protective. To avoid people taking issue with this practice, many malls, restaurants and other public places have created family lounges where moms and dads can change their infant's diapers, accompany their offspring to the facility and tend to their needs.

What's your opinion on children of the opposite sex in public restrooms?
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48 Comments

3 years 31 weeks

I can turn a blind eye to six and seven-year-old boys in the womens room, but I've seen boys as old as eight, nine and ten in there. That is too old and is disrespectful to the privacy of other women who use the bathroom!

3 years 44 weeks

Yesterday, while attending a swim meet, I tried to take my 5 year old son to the Ladies Locker Room/Restroom. A woman came over to me and told me that when her daughter comes out of the shower, she will be freak if she sees my son. We left and I had to find and coach my son into going to the men's locker room (by himself). I stood near the door and tried to blindly coach him into finding the toilets. NEVER AGAIN!!!! I can't put my 5 year old son in danger to appease the irrational fears of another child.

3 years 44 weeks

Most states have laws governing ages here. In many states, it is 7. I think that as long as you are following the law, you are okay. Beyond that age, it is rude though and makes many people uncomfortable. There is a reason that bathrooms are labeled by sex--b/c many people aren't comfortable using the rr with someone of the same sex.

mia marie39 4 years 32 weeks

when i was little girl and my mom used to do this with my brother i was in a huff because icouldn't go in the boys restroom but he could go into the girls plus i didn't understand completely. now that i'm going to be a mommy my son would stay with me even at like 6! too many molesters and the child abuse rate for little boys is going up because they are less likely to tell than girls so i'm all for boys following mothers into the restroom

MissSushi 4 years 32 weeks

I would NEVER EVER under ANY circumstances let my young son (not that i have one) go into a bathroom unattended. I dont think they should even really go in without an older buddy or atetndant. Kids of ALL ages, not just young, but preteen and teens, get molested and kidnapped. I totally agree with the rest, absolutely not. She can pull the pole out of her rear and get over it. on the note of pushy nosy people, i get CONSTANT comments. I cant go to the store without someone making a snide remark, adn im not exagerrating. My daugther is 9 months old, but nearer the size of a skinny 1 1/2 - 2 year old. Because of this i get a whole host of comments about the things i shoudlnt be doing and the things i should be doing. Its annoying and exhausting to explain to people that my "toddler" is drinking a bottle because shes 9 months old. That my "kid" is in the car without shoes becuase she cant walk on her own and quite frankly, shoes are NOT comfortable for babies. Their feet are still on the carseat and it causes them to have to lay their feet down at odd angles.

anniekim 4 years 32 weeks

thanks,I am going to do the same.

Greggie 4 years 32 weeks

I just copied and pasted the laws from a website and put it into Word, then printed it out.

anniekim 4 years 33 weeks

Greggie--the card carrying is such a good idea. Did you type it up yourself or are such things available in CA?

Greggie 4 years 33 weeks

I carry cards in the diaper bag with the California laws protecting breastfeeding. I've only had to refer to them once, but it was nice and handy to have it around.

iieee_grrl 4 years 33 weeks

I had a woman demand my gym membership be taken away because I took my 10 month old son into a locker-room because he was still breastfeeding and I was in PAIN and there are no non-lockerroom restrooms. I took him from the childcare center to the lockerroom to nurse him (in a changing stall) and she threw a fit. People are just ridiculous.

Schaianne 4 years 33 weeks

OOPS - for someone to quickly change a child's looks and take off with him/her!

Schaianne 4 years 33 weeks

Up to a certain age, I see no problem with it. I'm sorry, but I'm not letting a small child go into a restroom by theirself - especialy not with all the perverts around. It takes SECONDS

Jude C 4 years 33 weeks

It doesn't bother me unless the kid is one of those that runs around screaming and looking under stalls and stuff (and the mother is one of those who doesn't seem to care). Then it drives me nuts.

kindo1313 4 years 33 weeks

I think it's ridiculous for anyone to even care. I have a son and I'll be taking him into the restroom with me until he's old enough to go by himself to the men's room. And in these times, that isn't going to be until he's well past 6 years old! For crying out loud, it's not like he's going to see anything anyway--you're all in private stalls!

Greggie 4 years 33 weeks

I always think of when my sister brought her two boys into the women's room and they asked what the tampon dispenser was. My sister told them it was just things for women. One pointed to the picture on the side of a woman riding a bike and said "See? Stuff for women." The other one got a really disbelieving look on his face and said "I don't think they can fit a bike in there."

Great Sommelier 4 years 33 weeks

On a lighter note. Back in college my sister worked in a movie theater. One day she got really intestinally sick during matinee hours. She was in the bathroom having issues when a mother came in with her two young sons, probably 4 and six or thereabouts. My sister tried to hold it all in until they left, but couldn't. She started tooting those sick awful toots. The mother was in a stall with the younger of the two while the older boy was in his own. The mother started yelling at the son to stop making the tooting noises. My sister kept going because it was beyond her control. The mother kept yelling. The little boy was screaming, it's not me!! I still do the aching laughter every time I think about that.

Great Sommelier 4 years 33 weeks

The gall of some people. I always wonder if people who say things like this are parents. I have to say, when it comes to me protecting my child, I don't give a damn what anyone else thinks. That's just the momma bear coming out in me!

PinkNC 4 years 33 weeks

I don't have a problem with children of the opposite sex being in the bathroom with me. I mean they are children and they need to be supervised. These days it's a lot safer to keep your child with you all the time. Just waiting outside the bathroom for them is not enough when it comes to their safety. It doesn't take a child molester long to molest your child. The way I see it.... anyone that has a problem with it, has serious issues and they just love to cause drama. Having a young child of the opposite sex in the bathroom with you is NOT a big deal...oh, and of course as long as the children are behaving.

Greggie 4 years 33 weeks

macgirl, that one was about the locker rooms at gyms. A lot of us got flamed for daring to take our sons into there.

g1amourpuss 4 years 33 weeks

Ditto anniekim for my daughter and husband! That's only happened once to him when I had to work so he took her to the doctor instead of me taking her. I felt bad.

g1amourpuss 4 years 33 weeks

Well there are issues like what if her son was molested in the men's bathroom and he was alone in there by himself. I would feel horrible as a mother if that happened. But I have a daughter. The only thing that pisses me off is when the little boys are peeking into the stall I'm in. Other than that, they're just children. Get over it. I would probably start letting go a little though, if he was about 6. If something seemed strange while I waited - I would definitely go into the men's room. I wouldn't have a problem with doing something like that if I had a son.

macgirl 4 years 33 weeks

I think there was a post about male kids in the ladies room a long time ago on lilsugar. I'm pretty sure I was flamed for occasionally bringing my 9 year old into the ladies room (it really depends on where we are and how much I trust who's lurking in the mens room). I'm pretty non confrontational so I probably wouldn't have said anything to that woman but it would have pissed me off for sure.

Pallas Athena 4 years 33 weeks

I've never gotten comments and neither has anyone in my family when the boys or girls (small children obviously) in my family went into the opposite bathroom. My cousin sends her two sons together or even three since the oldest is 9 and then the next two are 7 and 6. Otherwise, they would just use the women's bathroom.

schnappycat 4 years 33 weeks

Greggie, that was my first thought--why would Target have such a long line? I've never even seen anyone in our Target restroom (I think ours also has a family one FWIW). LOL.

xoclirpa 4 years 33 weeks

I have a young son and there is no way in hell I would ever let him go to the restroom by himself. As for the comment that woman made, I think it was best just to ignore her. What an ignorant person to make a comment like that!

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