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OnSugar Blog: Mother of All Fears

Lots of moms think out loud, and Tiffany Carboni does too. Mother of All Fears comes from the Mother Tongue & Other Sharp Objects blog at OnSugar.

Anyone who’s ever called women the weaker sex has never worn stilettos with a girdle and fasted all day in order to fit into an ugly bridesmaid dress that’s two sizes too small and still managed to look energetic on the dance floor. Anyone who thinks a girl’s ingredient list is sugar and spice and everything nice has never been inside the locker room after a women’s sporting event or with a friend who was just betrayed by her lover. Anyone who has dared called the female species fragile has never been to a day-after-Thanksgiving sale or had a bikini wax.

A woman’s strength deserves to be respected, appreciated, and—when appropriate—feared. No matter how meek or docile a girl might seem as a child, she will develop her physical and emotional strength through challenging life events that will help shape who she is. Motherhood is one of those tests. As if to play a joke on us mortals, God made sex fun in order to entice unsuspecting women into pregnancy. It is at the point of conception that the female body receives a grenade-like announcement to its system and everything goes screwy for the next 20 or so years.

Before a woman gives birth, she endures a grueling, nearly-10-month experience that offers a host of conditions that would have anyone else running to a doctor in a panic. These conditions include vomiting; nausea; headaches; acne; backaches; swollen extremities; moodiness; memory loss; bloating; nasal congestion; facial discoloration; dizziness; fainting; constipation; sciatica; odd hair growth; rapid weight gain; gas; irritability; clumsiness; extreme tiredness and insomnia (often simultaneously); heartburn; frequent need to urinate; loss of bladder control; stretch marks; and a general annoyance with just about everything and everyone. And that’s a healthy pregnancy. To finish reading this post, click here.

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