Is Divorce More Devastating When Kids Are Involved?

July 14, 2009

When a couple splits, people wish both parties the best. But, the breakup of a family involves more than a husband and a wife. Mom and dad may decide to take different paths, but children are affected and often caught in the midst of the mayhem, making it hard not to feel for them. Do you think divorce is more devastating when it involves children?

Source: Getty

10 Comments

Pampire 3 years 44 weeks

Absolutely! Especially if the kids are older and aware of what's happening. I was barely 2 when my parents divorced and I don't remember my parents ever being together so it wasn't hard on me but what was hard was dividing the time between the two and missing one when I was with the other. However children that are older and aware it could be absolutely devastating and they could blame themselves.

3 years 44 weeks

Divorce is a horrible experience for parents and kids alike, and I'm sorry for anyone that has had to endure it. There are many schools of thought of what is the best avenue in regards to the children involved. I read a study recently that what causes children to really be damaged in the situation is not the divorce itself, but the back and forth between two houses and the emotional attachment and detachment of their parents' new signigicant others. So this study suggested that if the parents can keep the kids in one house and divide their time there equally, and not introduce them to every person they go on a date with, then they should adjust to the situation ok and not grow up with commitment or abandonment issues. Not sure if I agree with this completely, but it was an interesting perspective.

3 years 44 weeks

I can't imagine anyone who would think otherwise!

miamixo 3 years 44 weeks

Of course! This is a no brainer.

Go2Girl 3 years 44 weeks

I think it has a huge impact on children if the divorce is nasty but if parents remain friends and/or the separation was amicable, then the children will be better adjusted.

lickety split 3 years 44 weeks

always worse when children are involved. we have friends that are going through a divorce now, after 16 years of marriage. the kids are are really suffering. the parents are suffering all the more because their kids are hurting.

3 years 44 weeks

And another thing, the second option, "children sometimes suffer the consequences of divorce" is ridiculous. The answer is always.

3 years 44 weeks

Anyone who thinks it's equally devastating whether or not you have kids should never have kids. If you make you bed, then you are the one who lies in it. But to involve children who never asked to be born in a situation because their parents are too selfish to get along is exponentially worse. I know that people get married and divorced as quickly as they finish their vows, but just because something is common and normal in society today, doesn't mean that the innocents involved won't be affected by it.

Chrstne 3 years 44 weeks

If you have kids, obviously divorce is a very sticky situation, because a lot of time, at the end of the day you end up with a very fractured family. I was fairly old when my parents divorced (18), but they had separated once before when I was 13, and well, the entire situation, their entire marriage was one screwed up situation. I will say that while the divorce made things a little calmer for all parties, it also ruined any hint of a family we ever had. My parents cannot get along, and three years later, still have on-going court battles. My brother is torn between my mom and dad, and I can't stomach my dad, and can only handle my mom when she isn't attention-whoring her divorce. We will never be a real family. I don't think we ever were. It can be absolutely life changing and devastating if the children care. I don't care at all...so I was perfectly okay with it. I had wanted it since I was 7! But people like my brother who are all emotional about it and want their parents together, their lives get turned upside down.

runningesq 3 years 44 weeks

um, yes ?

Link Love

10 Comments

You Might Also Like