People who enjoy doing the horizontal mambo without protection often find themselves entering parenthood. So it goes without saying that those same couples like to return the activity once baby arrives. Expectant mothers who fear the demise of their sex lives due to a vaginal delivery are choosing to have c-sections with the hopes that damages and pain are kept to a minimum. However, there are conflicting reports on whether the method of delivery actually affects one's sex life. Dutch researcher H.J. Brummen, M.D. found:
The study should reassure women who give birth vaginally that except in rare cases, physical factors following childbirth shouldn't affect sexual functioning.
Another study in the Journal of Sexual Medicine stated just the opposite:
Since the turn of the last century, investigators have hypothesized that pregnancy and delivery of an infant can result in anatomical and functional derangement in pelvic floor and intrapelvic organs... Many issues that were not previously incorporated into the planning mode of delivery may now be considered to be of great importance. Among these is sexual function.... We think the results of this study are quite convincing in demonstrating an association between mode of delivery and sexual function.
Do you think your method of delivery affected your sex life?
DAY Birger et Mikkelsen
Mantaray
Lee
I haven't had a baby, but here is my opinion. I don't think vaginal delivery has any real detriments to you in the long run. Your hoo-ha may or may not be the same, but is it a huge deal? Your vagina is going to stretch, and it may or may not stay that way depending on the size of your baby, how many you have had, and if you do the kegel exercises. Sometimes, even if you have a huge baby and 8 of them, it will go back to normal.
I don't see how a C-section avoids anything. Sure, it avoids a stretched out vagina, but then you are left with scars, etc.
1I have had one child and the only thing that changed was I find it very difficult to wear tampons anymore. They don't stay in right but sex is still lots of fun. I had my son vaginally and he weighed nearly 10 pounds.
2Cheers to you cheersdarlin! 10 pounds! You deserve a medal for that.
3I think parenthood has changed my sex life, not pushing the kid out. I still love to have sex with my husband and I'm sure I will the after the next one is born!
4I had a c-section (not elective) and it was still painful for me, even when I waited 6 weeks (well almost, haha!). I think no matter what way you give birth to your child, things are bound to change a little bit. As for it affecting our sex life? Not at all. I think that's more of an emotional change between the parents if that happens. Like bluepuppybites said above, parenthood has changed our sex life. We might be more tired one night and just have no energy. We still enjoy it though! It just may not happen as often!
5Three months after delivering my child, I too notice that tampons don't go/stay in right anymore. I've also noticed, for me, that everything actually feels tighter and more sensitive down there. This may be from them stitching me up though. But it's definitely different.
6I have had 2 vaginal deliveries and I've found that Kegel Excercises are a must! Do them daily for 5 minutes at a time and I'm telling you not only will you notice a difference but so will your partner
7i had my daughter by c-section after 30 hours of labor and a horrible laboring experience. my daughter is now 4 months old and my husband and i have only attempted to have sex once since her birth. it hurts WAY too much. and honestly, i just don't have the energy or the want to have sex.
8I had my baby vaginally (7lb 6oz), and I was terrified of what a vaginal birth (and an episiotomy) would do to my sex life. Ironically, sex is WAY better physically for me after the baby. I don't know if it was the pregnancy or the delivery, but somehow having a baby "rewired" me and now I can feel things more intensely inside of me. Sex used to hurt a bit beforehand, and now it's smooth sailing! Besides, a recent study has shown that women who deliver vaginally vs C-section women vs women who have never carried children do not show major differences in incidences of urinary incontinence later in life. So if pushing out a baby won't make you more incontinent when you're older, then it's probably safe to assume that it won't make your sexual functioning take a nose dive either. Push away, ladies!
)
9I have had both my children vaginally (7lbs 2oz, 8lbs 7.6oz) and the only real difference I've noticed is what has already been mentioned... I have far more sensation inside than I ever did before & that causes tampons to be uncomfortable, but it makes sex great. I also agree that being a parent is what changes your sex life, not your method of delivery.
10How about nursing and sex? If you breastfeed, the lining of your "hoo-ha" thins and there is less natural lubrication. Sex is still enjoyable, but I wish someone had mentioned that side-effect so I knew what to expect. I nursed for a year the first time and that was a long time to use KY.
11I've had 2 c-sections and 2 vaginal deliveries. The 2 vaginals were 10lbs 8oz and 9lbs 6oz and I had no change in my sex drive or sex in general. After both c-sections though, I have absolutely no sex drive. It took about 6mos after the first one (twins) to want to do it again, and there was no feeling down there either. The baby now is only 4mos and I still don't want to. So I say push, don't opt for the c-section
12I delivered two children vaginally and I'm not sure about the second time (too early to tell) but after my first I could not have an orgasm from sex. Something changed or moved in there or something 'cause we could not find that spot for anything. So obviously as time passed I lost pretty much all interest in it because it wasnt fun for me anymore.
13I had an uncomplicated and unmedicated vaginal delivery of a 7 lb 9 oz little girl with a second degree tear. My sex life is exactly the same, and my husband says it feels the same to him.
For the first few months, it was definitely difficult and uncomfortable, but around the 6 month mark, it got a lot more comfortable and now it basically feels back to normal.
FYI: If you're nursing, this will definitely affect your sex life. Since nursing affects your hormones, it also affects certain things about sex, such as natural lubrication and the ability of your vagina to stretch. At 6 months or so out, the hormones start to regulate a bit and these issues aren't so prominent. At 8 months out, I am still nursing as much as I ever did, and things are so much better now.
14I've had two cesareans. One was a coerced, unnecessary c/s that resulted in PPD and PTSD (they were both diagnosed by my midwife, OB, and therapist, and psychiatrist), the other was a home vbac turned repeat c/s. Sex after the first c/s was almost impossible for close to a year because I was so terrified of becoming pregnant again and having to go through what happened last time. It hurt, it was not at all enjoyable, and my mind was *so* not in the right place.
Sex, this second time around, is much better, but I have noticed a difference in tightness and it is now more difficult to O--it just seems like it takes more work in general on my part. We use AstroGlide because of the nursing dryness, but that's no biggie, and I recently invested in some SmartBalls. So far, so good.
I have to say, however, I have serious issues with my husband touching my incision scar due to the numbness. It just doesn't feel good to me.
So, my thoughts? Have a vaginal birth. Not only will your body be healthier, your babies and your sex life will be too.
15My DD will be 7 months old tomorrow and DH & I still haven't DTD. Horrible, I know. I had a very dramatic vaginal birth - tearing badly not only outside, but also inside (which required immediate surgery after birth) and besides the absolute lack of a sex drive, the thought of DTD still makes me nervous.
16Sex? What sex? I delivered my daughter in April and we had sex once two weeks ago and the last encounter when she was conceived. So I haven't been able to tell if sex is enjoyableanymore. I do know that I am married to a horrible husband who sucks.
17In May of 2007, I delivered (vaginally) a healthy beautiful 6lb. 15oz baby boy. He is the silver lining in the mess you are about to read. After going back and forth for a year with his adulterating father, I finally left him. My sexual experiences with his father was great because we loved each other. Physically though, his father had a small, skinny penis. My vag was average before my son, so I was worried about my stuff feeling loose. Okay here's the important part if you're worried about this kinda thing. The sex between him and I was good, I was still able to climax and so was he. If he and I would have worked out, I imagine our sex life would have been great. FYI: Vaginal births do make things more sensitive down there, which is very nice after you're healed
) Okay, now onto the aftermath. Once I left him, a girlfriend of
mine convinced me the only way to get over him was to bang someone else. So, I decided to have a fling or two, (Which is SUCH A BAD IDEA. I DO NOT, I repeat, I DO NOT encourage anyone to do
because it does not work. Period!) The first guy was young, I don't even know his age, 21 maybe? I didn't really care at the time. Anywho, his stuff was about average and the sex was
terrible. I mean really, it was bad. So, onto guy number two. This guy was hung like a horse and knew what he was doing. The sex was good, but meaningless and empty. Needless to say, I
haven't had sex since (that was last year). So, to recap, sex after vaginal birth can be amazing and great, but save it for someone who will love you and your post-baby body.
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