first of all, i do not consider myself a "spanker". the question asks if we think kate's actions were her own business or not. so that should be rephrased.

second, although i don't consider myself to be a spanker... i have spanked my child lightly on rare occasion-- 'spanks' (usually on the hand) are reserved for danger situations, when my child's disregard could result in her getting hurt.

I am anti-spanking in general, but if you are going to spank, it's wrong to do it when you are so angry. In those pictures, Kate looks out-of-control, and to me that's the biggest no-no if you're going to use physical discipline.

When I was a kid, I got "spanked" only when I was really naughty. I say "spanked" because my mom used such a light hand that it couldn't have stung — it was more upsetting to me to know that I was really in trouble. Total psych-out.

If I ever have a child, I don't think I would spank — but then again, I don't have a screaming two-year-old who refuses to listen to me. (My toddler will be the picture of decorum, of course.) But seriously, I don't think it's a good way to discipline.

I agree with Chouette4u... Kate looks out of control in that photo. (When I had my bottom swatted, it was always one of those things where my mom would say, "It's time for a spanking" and then she'd sit me down. And again, *that* was more upsetting to me than the actual tiny swat on my bottom ever was.)

The stress of fame seems to be getting to Kate, and the other kids look pretty concerned. I just wish the Gosselin mania would go away. I've never seen this show and don't want to, but I feel bad for those children. Kids don't need to be famous. I don't think it's good for them.

Im glad the paps were there, I hope they keep the pressure on, maybe one day it will get to her and she'll finally realize its time to quit the show.

didn't see this, but a swat on the butt is more about the impact to the child that they crossed the line than anything else. it doesn't physically hurt them, it's the idea of mom saying "DONE". i do i when necessary, which is about once a month these days.

Well, spanking is not like child abuse. If you occasionally spank a child, but give them more positive reinforcement and positive experiences, then a spank is not going to hurt. I don't think that a parent should not spank, it's their choice, but there are better ways in dealing with children. I do not have any of my own, but I have dealt with and taught large groups of younger kids, and you learn quickly that the best way to discipline is not with your hands.

Spanking, I don't think should be done to hurt the child. If I was spanked, it was so light, it did not hurt. It was the psychology behind the spanking that was the real punishment.

When these kids get older boy will they have books to wright
another Mommy Dearest ? I believe in spanking when the
punishment fits the crime this didn't and punishment calls
for some privacy

Oh, I was an awful, awful child. Horrid little thing. I know I deserve to be spanked. I got a hand or a belt. I really think it was the only thing that set me straight.
Am I going to spank my kids? I think that is too hard of a question to answer seeing as I don't have kids.

I think she has the right to spank her children, but I think she should keep her discipline out of the site of paparazzi even if that means quitting the show.

sahmanswers.com

She doesn't look "out of control" to me. She's bending down to spank her. It looks like the little girl is squirming to move away, as any child I would assume would do. That said I think it's her business how she disciplines her kids

Sonic, I saw a couple additional pictures on another blog (but they have since been taken down) that showed what happened before Kate hit Leah and as she was approaching her, and you can tell that Kate was really angry and this was not a calm and rational act at all.

Kate like most parents remain uneducated since they find no lifelong harmfuls side effects from there own childhood spankings. Human behavior science has uncovered that spanking is unpredictibly psychologically harmful for some children. I was such a victim. People in general greatly resent anyone one else dictating how they treat their children. Parenthood is an expression of an entitled freedom. the description of the act of spanking is quite variable. Most adults accept any breif non permanent slapping with hand or object upon a childs bottom culturally normal child appropriate punishment. What they don't realize is many variations of how a spanking is administered increase the risk of long term emotional and psychological effects into adulthood. And child temperment greatly impacts the psychological interpretation of the punishment. I was such a victim and suffered a lifelong sexual addiction for being ritually partially stripped and exposed genitally to my mother for a hand spanking over her knee in very strict formal ritual fashion. It was traumatizing and even as a child my psychological defense mechanisms unconsciously kicked in. My timid shy temperment believed I was being tortured and killed. Thus I unconsciously sexualized the experience and developed a sexual fetish for being punished with spanking by a female authority figure. I've lived in shame and fear for these abbarent sexual desires being discovered and finally sought helpl. Once in therapy my buried subconscious memories were brought to the surface and I've had to suffer post-tramatic stress disorder flashbacks of my mother's spankings. Now when I see another child being hurt or killed I relive these flashbacks. In therapy I discovered my mother was possibly also a victim. She enjoyed the ritual process of making me fearful and powerless and creating deep shame emotions by punishing so exposed this way. She had an unconscious sadistic attraction to spanking and it motivated her to use this punishment before other forms. This is a sure way to continue a cycling of abuse and robb children of normal healthy sexuality. Other child punishment methods are more effective and potentially less harmful. Many parents live with this type of sexual fetish and dont' put the pieces of the puzzle together or they dont' see anything wrong in risking giving their children a sexual fetish with spanking. Trauma is experienced at different thresholds for the individual child. But the more emotional fear, shame, and pain inflict of longer duration will threaten their emotional and sexual health. It would seem Kate was mot introducing much shame into her spanking but we will not know if trauma occured. Only the victim will live with this problem having to find an understanding sexual partner later in life or seeking professional help to overcome it. I've many professional sources and blog articles to validate my experience shared here just ask if you open minded enough to learn more about it.

I don't think there is anything wrong with a light tap on the butt, so a child know's you mean business. But from the look of the pictures i saw this was not the case Kate was really pissed and whaled (sp?) on her and it looked like it really hurt Leah. That is not necessary.

I was spanked as a child. As a young child - with a wooden spoon. When I got older - with a belt. It did me no harm. I'm a happy, well-adjusted adult, and I ADORE my parents. They are my husband and mine favorite double date. We hang out all the time. And often laugh about how I was such a bratty kid. I regard being spanked as necessary child development that made me a better person.

Note: I agree that a parent should never spank out of anger. Each time I was spanked, my parents sat down with me prior to the spanking explained to me what I did wrong and why I was being spanked. And then after the spanking, we prayed together and asked God for forgiveness. No harm other than a few minutes of a stinging but.

These photos were taken outside of the family home which is gated and surrounded by large trees and bushes. Their house is set far away from the streets. I don't think these pictures were taken by paparazzi (if they were, the paps were probably trespassing.) I think its more likely that they were taken by an inside person, who, obviously shouldn't be this close to the family if they are so willing to sell them (the kids) out.
Who's really exploiting the kids here? Kate? No, the insider (or paps) that took the picture of Leah being spanked, realized that they had tabloid gold, and sold it to the magazine.

as for the question whether or not it's anybody's business but hers as to how she disciplines her kids, it is. only because she has exploited her children for her own benefit, putting herself in the spotlight. the spotlight doesn't stop shining when you do something you don't want others to see...

Im glad the paps were there, I hope they keep the pressure on, maybe one day it will get to her and she'll finally realize its time to quit the show.

Haus I am with you 100%!!! It's time for Kate to finally put her family first and end this show!

I don't love spanking but obviously there's a context- was it rough or abusive, is the child taken care of physically and emotionally, is the mother flying off the handle with anger, etc.

Ugh, so much parading of innocent kids.

We were spanked as children if we misbehaved and you know what? My siblings and I all had wonderful childhoods, were great students, went to good colleges, have great jobs and a very close relationship with our parents. Discipline in the home is key. I cannot stand this woman, but I totally agree with this statement.

I have had spankings when I was kid. I have been spanked with a belt when I was little and what that does that say to you as a kid..."I better not do this again." So guess what...I never did it again...spanking is a necessary evil for some kids. Kate didn't choke the living life out of her or throw her around like a rag doll. She gave her a few swats on the legs and butt. I don't even think Kate hit her hard...all kids cry and over dramatize. I have seen it, I have been babysitting as long as I have been old enough to dial 911. They start crying when they don't get their way and you wave a cookie in their face they're quiet. Kate has a right to give her child a tap tap tap. Go Kate. These kids will grow up and walk right over you if you don't discipline them. I have seen it. I like parents who are strict when they need to be.

Spanking out of anger is the reason why so many people are anti-spanking today. Parents should use spanking at the point where it hurts them more than the child. I guess everyone's so scared of being considered abusive that this is why so many kids control their parents now.

I don't even like Kate Gosselin but every parent has the right to 'spank' their kids. Sending kids to the corner for time out doesn't always work! LoL

I saw a picture of Leah's face on another blog. There was such anguish & pain on her little face, it just broke my heart. If she wants to spank her kids, that's her decision, but it looks to me like she really hurt her little girl.

Here's the link to the article on Popeater. It's the second of the three pictures if anyone is interested.

http://www.popeater.com/television/article/kate-gosselin-spanking-leah-photos/529806?icid=main|main|dl3|link3|http%3A%2F%2Fwww.popeater.com%2Ftelevision%2Farticle%2Fkate-gosselin-spanking-leah-photos%2F529806

I agree with Cali Lawyer. I was spanked with wooden spoons, belts, hands, whatever my parents could get their hands on. It was manly my father, not my mother, she was too sweet for that. But now, as an adult, I am fine. So is my brother. I love my parents completely and I have zero emotional damage from being slapped with a belt when I was being difficult. Would I get a whooping when I simply didn't clean my room or called my brother a bad name? No. I would get whoopings after repeated offenses on things that are completely unacceptable behavior, like yelling at my mother or pitching unnecessary fits over and over for simply not getting what I wanted. I think too many people are shying away from spankings because they want to be their child's friend or they are too scared to have their child mad at them. Well, I'm sorry. You're child should not like you sometimes; it means you are doing your job right; if they love (i mean love and not like as in be happy or upset with) you 24/7, they are controlling you which is never good. Life is hard so of course raising a child should be one of the hardest, bumpiest rides you're ever going to take and so should a parent child relationship. Some of the people above are right: you should never hit a child hard enough to hurt them...that is abuse for certain, but a light slap to let them know you mean business is not bad. Children are young and their vocabulary is not to the level to have conversations where they will understand things beyond the word 'no' or 'stop' or 'don't do that' and since we as parents say that all the time the words get over used and the child over looks it and thinks we are not being serious anymore. So for those instance when you really need them to listen because if they repeat what they just did it could potentially hurt someone perhaps even themselves or offend someone or make something happen that shouldn't...I have three boys. I've experienced it all so tons of stories are coming to my mind. Anyway, my point: sometimes a spanking is needed to make your point, don't do it too hard, just to make sure they know you're for real. **Be sure to tell them why you're spanking them!!! Or the spanking is irrelevant!

I am a mom to triplet boys and though my husband & I are not spankers in general, we do find some instances require such discipline. I'm sure the pressure of being in the spotlight is starting to get to Kate and I think spanking your child for blowing a whistle when your on the phone is a bit much. Go to another area of the house/yard where there's less noise. Having said that, I don't think it's wrong to spank a child if their behaviour deems it appropriate.

So what, people are giving testimony that they were spanked and now they are OK so it's acceptable? And what about those who aren't OK and are really traumatized?

I say NO to any kind of spanking. Besides there is a very thin line between "innocent" spank and beating child up.

I absolutly agree with her although I cant stand her. In my opinon the problem with most of today's youth, (i.e. violence, disrespect of elders, lack of initiative, the mindset of "You owe me something", and just plain bad attitude., is the lack of discipline. My mother spanked my siblings and myself; we are all very successful, spiritual and happy individuals with a great support family unit. We all have children that have graduated in the top 10 percent of their respective classes and have gone on to further their education. We SPANK their butts when they misbehaved. Luckily it was not required often because we SPANK their butts. Their is a difference in abuse and discipline and I truly feel we have need to return back to the older times when this over analyzing was not the case and we had a better society. I can remember when the behaviors I mentioned above were the exception and not the "rule"

Kate has the right to discipline her child as she sees fit. I was spanked as a child, not often, but enough, and my parents never sat me down to tell me why I was being spanked. I can't recall a time I got spanked where I didn't know what I was being spanked for, there is always a warning first. I love my parents, and have never been 'scared' of them. But you can sure bet that I respect them. The little monsters you see on super nanny, nanny 911, and other similar shows are usually the products of parents who are anti-spanking. I definitely don't think you should spank over any minor infraction, but there are times when enough is enough.

Well Pap she didn't beat a child either. She gave her a few taps. Also Kate didn't spank her because she blew a whistle. Kate told her to stop, and the little girl didn't listen. Disobeying your parents simple requests is not ok, children have to learn that young. Kate choose to discipline with a few taps, she didn't beat her. I bet you she didn't blow that whistle again.

Pap, I must disagree, too. Regardless of how you feel about spanking, I think there is a big difference between it and beating a child up.

I was spanked as a child, but I'm not about to say that my emotional health as an adult "proves" that spanking is okay. The real problem I have with Kate spanking (and a problem with spanking in general) is that I've seen so many instances on the show in which she's screaming bloody murder at the children, "No hitting [each other]!" Yet Mommy's allowed to hit. It's inconsistent and, I would assume, confusing for the child.

I was spanked very little as a child and I turned out fine. I don't have children so I don't know if I am going to spank them or not. However, I wouldn't judge anyone that does. Different strokes... I don't think Kate looks "out of control" in the pics. I think she looks irritated. Would it make more sense if she was smiling from ear to ear?! Don't think so.

come on! its a magazine and they´re trying to sell. she´s not out of control probably upset , its not that bad the girl just overreact like every child does. relax and enjoy your children

another article said something about Kate "publicly spanking her child." Looks to me like they are outside of the house, which, legally, is private property. They weren't at a restaurant, they weren't at a park, they weren't on the sidewalk outside of the coffee shop. They were at home, and she disciplined in a manner she saw fit. The mags need to quit blowing stuff out of proportion...

i think children hitting each other and a parent spanking their child are totally different. It's not a punch to the face. I don't see the harm in spanking, obviously if it's excessive then that's a different issue. I don't think she looks out of control there, angry yes, but not raging. I was spanked as a child and like others said it was more about the embarrassment. And to this statement "So what, people are giving testimony that they were spanked and now they are OK so it's acceptable? And what about those who aren't OK and are really traumatized?" I think if a child is truley traumatized then it was just spanking, there was extra force and that's more along the lines of child abuse. The spanking most people are mentioning about themselves was not a scarring, emotionally or physcially, event.

I agree with whomever originally said you shouldn't spank when you're agree, but really I don't think that she's totally angry in the pic. Hear me out before you get all crazy on me.

How many times have we seen pics of famous couples in gossip magazines that a body language expert said were splitting up when in reality they are still together and happy. Most of the time they just happen to be shifting their weight for a micro-second? Do I believe in body language...sure, but I also know that a picture is a short ittty bitty section of time that doesn't show the full story.

The reason the cops were at her house was because of the paparazzi which might explain the horrible looking face she's making in the main pic.

That being said, I don't pass judgment on her in this situation. We don't know if it was just a tap or a full blown spanking. You can guess what it was, but you weren't there so there's no way you can KNOW.

Ugh why don't I proof read? Meant to have a period (.) after "micro-second" not a question mark.

I think most parents use whatever method of discipline works best for their child and the situation that at time. If she thought the situation required that and she deemed it appropriate that's her decision. I probably wouldn't do that to a child that age. I think by then their starting to outgrow that stage of discipline at least it was like that with my children.

All I have to say is Spare the rod and spoil the child. There is nothing wrong with a little spanking once in a while. In fact I think there would be a lot less bratty children in this world if there parents gave them a good wack once in a while. That's my opinion and I'm sticking to it!

First off, I dislike Kate immensely. She is odious.

However, I was spanked when I was out of control as a child and my mother was hardly abusive. For crying out loud, I gave my mom panic attacks with my difficult behavior and crazy antics. Oddly enough I was a very docile teenager, but as a kid I was a neurotic mess.

Anyway, a few times my mother lost it. She couldn't handle me kicking and screaming on the floor. My dad would occasionally spank me too. It was warranted. Maybe it's not the method most parents agree with nowadays, but it's hardly child abuse to get a swat on the can.

This will be unpopular, but this generation of kids is really spoiled. The crap my cousin gets away with is unbelievable and she's still going to get a cell phone after behaving very rudely towards her parents, who give her everything. My mother would never have stood for it.

I was spanked, and spanked often because I was a little wild and a lot determined and constantly doing things I knew I had no business doing. Here's the thing, though: My mother had long been explaining to me the meaning of CONSEQUENCES. Her favorite spiel began like this: You can do anything you want... as long as you are prepared for the consequences.

As long as your kids understand what the rights and wrongs are, and as long as they know that some of those things have a spanking awaiting at the end of them, and as long as the spanking does not seriously injure (minor injuries are possible with kids who do bruise easily and sometimes there are - don't freak out - welts) then spanking is a perfectly legitimate form of punishment.

Now, this is not to say that spanking works for all kids or even should be used on all kids. It appears that several posters here were spanked and felt it to be over the top. If it's obvious that a kid really has a gentle soul, well, a parent should take that into consideration when considering the punishment for the child. I think we've evolved sufficiently as a society that most people of middle class means have started to do that. (Coming from a fairly poor family, I know some of my cousins could care less about their kids' tender hearts as much as they care about immediate and thorough obedience. Whether this is as it should be is moot because I'm not discussing it here.)

In terms of whether Leah deserved to be spanked for (continuing) to blow the whistle, well, I can't say because I didn't see the lead up. But if that child had been asked/told to stop that particular behavior, and was still defiantly marching up and down with that whistle, she may have deserved whatever swats she received. The lesson here is pay attention when I'm talking to you. When I ask you not to do something, it's not an idle request.

I've heard this theory that spanking children teaches them that violence is ok. The hell it does. It taught me that there are limits to my independence; that my actions have effects on others I may not intend, but should consider before acting. It taught me how much temporary pain I was willing to endure for whatever madness I'd gotten myself into (proving I could ride my bike all the way to swim practice was totally worth it). It taught me to think ahead to the end result and how to clean up after myself so as not to get caught. I never thought then nor do I now think that hitting someone is ok because I was spanked. Maybe because my spankings were explained to me; the connection between the spanking and my infractions were always clear. But if I have kids, I'm spanking them. First I'm sending them to their room so I can calm down (I'm quick to anger, but just as quick to calm down), then going in to have a conversation, then the spanking.

it is never ok to hit a child. ever, ever. spanking isn't even an effective discipline tool, it is the trademark of ineffective parenting.

#42 - Why? It sure as heck got me to stop my ridiculous behavior. And I learned not to do it again. It wasn't even painful, just a reminder that it's not OK to act like a lunatic.

I hv 2 boys 3 & 6.. I dont spank them but I yell at the top of my voice and at times they wl cry at that.. I feel realy bad after yelling.. So whch is worst ??

i have to agree that this is obviously private property and since the little girl wasnt on the ground screaming in agony while she was being pummeled that its not a case for anyone other then her parents to be picking apart. She was being spanked on the rear, not being burnt with lit ciggarettes. Lets calm down a bit, and leave the discipline to her mohter.

That being said, i TOTALLY agree that spanking has its time and place. We virtually never got spanked, probably less then 10 times my entire childhood, but when we did, we knew we deserved it and it usually struck home. I was an extremely obedient child, but every kid and teenager has their moments of defiance, its part of growing up, testing your bounderies, and discovering what independance is and isnt. I can remember vividly a time when i was 15 and thought i was right and my mother was wrong, and that was that, and i told her, very loudly and obnoxiously. It was the first, and only time, that i got a slap across the face. It was far more shocking then painful, and it was ABSOLUTELY needed. After picking my jaw up off the floor, finally LISTENING to what I was being told, I apologized and went to my room. I didnt challenge the point ever again, nor did i ever speak to my mother in such a disresectful manner again.

We were spanked as kids and both my brother and myself are perfectly fine. We got a spank when we were naughty and we learned not to do it again.

It was not child abuse. There is a big difference between spanking a child for discipline and beating up a child. I think a few people need to learn the difference between the two.

what did the child do to deserve being hit? I think spanking is demeaning especially in public!
If you need to 'discipline' your children by hitting them...look at the recent bad behaviour of these children's parents...is anyone hitting them?

There are other non-abusive ways to discipline a child. In the (non-verbatim) words of Susan Sarandon in "Little Women," "When you hit a child, the only thing you teach that child is to hit."

Kate spanked out of anger, it was obvious, not to discipline.

i think JonWil needs to get some therapy! or a friend to talk to...