I've never heard of a parent who found out her baby's sex in the delivery room and was disappointed. That's why when people ask my advice, I say to wait . . . especially if the impending mom or pop has a clear preference. I know both men and women who had their hearts set on a son or daughter and were a bit bummed when their ultrasound indicated otherwise. All parents eventually realized how lucky they were to be having healthy offspring.
But when the infant makes his or her debut and "It's a boy!" or "It's a girl" is announced, I'm convinced it's near impossible for parents to pull themselves away from the awe-inspiring moment to focus on anatomy. Do you think this is true?
Photos courtesy of TLC
Chloe
I wasn't really sure how I should vote. In my observation, people who are really set on a gender generally choose to find out before the baby is born. The thought of being disappointed by your baby's gender is really hard for me to understand.
1Having only waited to find out the sex, I can't tell you one way or the other. There was nothing to "accept" anyway, we were just as happy with a girl or a boy every time. Like Chouette, the concept of being disappointed is completely foreign to me.
2I couldn't vote either. While I think I wanted a little girl with my first that all went away the moment I heard I was going to have a boy. I don't think I've ever met anyone that was upset or had a hard time accepting the sex of their born or unborn child. I imagine there are probably those types out there.
3I can understand this completely! With my first, I really wanted a boy. My husband kept saying he wanted a girl just because he knew how bad I wanted a boy and wanted me to keep in mind it might be a girl. We didn't find out what we were having and the words, "It's a boy!" we wonderful to me and my husband. Wa also didn't find out with our second or third. With my second I really wanted another boy, but we heard,m "It's a Girl" and were both thrilled! I truly felt, especially with the first, that I would be dissappointed if I found out at an ultrasound, and it would take some time to come around, however waiting until delivery and going through the work and pain I was happy to have a healthy baby and be healthy myself!
4I don't think its really that far fetched to be "dissapointed" when you find out the sex on the ultrasound, espeically if its really early on, if it the pregnancy was a surprise, or if you amped yourself up for years and years and years for a certain sex. That being said, the dissapointment really doesnt last that long, but for a LOT of people, being pregnant is really abstract until the baby is born. Not to mention the slew of emotions and hormones going on, and you really have to keep in mind that while almost everyone cherishes their children, not every pregnancy starts out with angels singing and light shining down from the heavens.
5I didn't vote because I don't think the options are great. I think that people will be happy with what they are having (hopefully), whether they find out while pregnant or in the delivery room. I loved finding out before because I like to prepare everything (i.e. paint the room, buy stuff, etc.)and have that control. I knew that whatever I had, I would be happy and I was!
6i can't see being disappointed with the gender of your baby. talk about about shallow. try being told at the ultra sound that your child has a condition that is incompatible with life outside the womb and then get back to me with your disappointment.
7My husband and I were a little disappointed when we found out our second (and last) child was a girl as we already had a little girl. The disappointment didn't last very long and our ultrasound technition was pretty cool and pointed out it was okay to be a little disappointed. We love both our girls more than anything and now we can't imagine our family any other way. It is okay to be a little disappointed. I liked finding out in the ultrasound and having time to prepare for another little girl.
8We've tried twice to see what we were having, and couldn't really tell. For me I would love to have a boy. I've already set myself up for having another girl, which I will be happy with, but honestly our entire family is all girls, my cousins, my sister, their kids are all girls. I would love to play with some boy stuff. To call me shallow I find really offending. I'm also dealing with depression while being pregnant, this has made it very hard to bond with our unborn child. This is why I wanted to find the sex hoping it would help me have a better bond.
9bluepuppybites, I'm with you! So sorry to hear that you're having difficulties in this pregnancy, but glad you're trying what you can to make things better. I agree that it's offensive to be called shallow for being dissappointed! It's not as if it lasts long, but it is a bit of a downer. Would you be called shallow for being dissappointed that you didn't get something you'd asked for for Christmas or a birthday, or because you're favorite sports team lost an important game? You're down for a little while, but you move on and are happy about life.
10I literally just went though this, and gave birth to my daughter 8 days ago....Both my husband and I were hoping for a boy, and opted not to find out the sex till the baby was born.....My reason being was that I wanted it to be a surprise AND I was nervous about being disappointed for the remainder of my pregnancy if I found out at the US. I figured there was no way I could be disappointed when the baby was actually born. Well the baby ended up being a beautiful little girl, and we both couldn't have been happier....We did however talk about a few reasons why we were disappointed it was a girl and not a boy, my we weren't nearly as phased, nor did we focus on it at all as I feel we would have had we found out months ago.
11Losing a baby or finding out it has a life debilitating disease is absolutely horrific. My cousin lost a baby a few years ago to trisomy 18, and its not uncommon for tears for our family for these situations.
However, the insinuation that its shallow is really offensive. There will ALWAYS be someone somewhere that has it worse then you. Thats dealing with a worse situation then you. You cant live your life and rule your thoughts by someone else's situation. Our family doesnt skip meals and wear rags and avoid all forms of entertainment and education becuase some poeple arent able to have these things. I absolutely believe you need to apreciate what you have, but that doesnt mean you arent allowed to have normal human emotions about things becuase someone somewhere has it worse off.
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